Slip Up's That Can Spoil Your Wedding Ceremony - The Musician Plays at the Wrong Times

by Maureen Thomson

Picture this. The music starts. The officiant has everyone stand. Exactly on cue, you glide down the aisle on your father's arm. Your hair and makeup are stunning, your bouquet held at a perfect angle. You reach the front, kiss Dad good-bye, take your about-to-be husband's hand and face your officiant.

There's a pause in the action as the music continues to play...

And the music keeps playing...

And playing...

You glance at the officiant. "Is this music going on for an awfully long time, or am I just nervous?" you wonder.

You look over at your sweetie, who is beginning to look like he could throttle the DJ (organist, string quartet, harpist, Cousin Phil on his Ipod--whomever is responsible for playing the Song that Never Ends.)

And still, the music plays on...

Your guests begin to shuffle their feet...

"Make it Stop!" you silently beseech the heavens.

A baby cries...

Your stomach rumbles. You realize that in all the excitement, you forgot to eat...

This is so not the shining moment you envisioned.

The officiant tries to give your music person a subtle cue to stop playing. But he/she/they is/are too engrossed in what they are doing. The officiant ends up looking like a cross between a mime and someone with Tourette's.

To no avail, for the music plays on.

There is no choice but to endure it all until the song ends. By then, your guests are so fidgety that all they can think about is the party. As you murmur your vows, most of them are thinking, "I hope it's an open bar."

It's a simple slip-up to avoid, really. All it takes is a bit of communication between your officiant and your musician, but amateurs often overlook it, resulting in a scenario not unlike the one above. It's best to take things into your own hands and spend a minute or two pre-ceremony to confirm the following:
· How long is your entrance relative to the length of your processional song? If the song is more than 15-20 seconds longer than your walk time, then consider entering later in the song (a wait of up to a minute is fine--it builds anticipation and allows you to make a really excellent entrance). Alternatively, you can have the song fade shortly after you arrive at the altar. To do this, you need to make sure that the musician can see you or the officiant or someone who can see them, who can give the musician the high sign to cut it off.
· What songs are to be played and exactly when will they be played during the ceremony? Makes sure the musician knows his cue to play them.
· What are the last words your officiant will say before your recessional song plays? Will the music begin as you are kissing? Or will the officiant introduce you as Mr. and Mrs. before you swoop off? There's nothing worse that having the officiant bellow out your names over the recessional music, so make sure your musician knows to "hold their peace" (or should I say "piece?") until the appropriate moment.

When it comes to your ceremony music, a little coordination can go a long way!

Maureen Thomson is a wedding officiant and is the owner of Lyssabeth’s Wedding Officiants and is also the author of a DIY Write Your Own Ceremony E-Kit. Visit her websites at: Lyssabeth's Monterey Wedding Officiants , Lyssabeth's Fort Collins Wedding Officiants and Write Your Own Wedding Ceremony E-kit